When love is gone, arguments come. Family law lawyer Ingeborg Rocket-Dombek on maintenance, divorce and prenuptial agreements.
Woman Rocket-Dombek, as a lawyer you have been dealing with divorces for many decades. Why do couples break up today?
The most common reason is still: cheating.
So nothing has changed at all?
Not really. The focus today is on the smartphone, both when it comes to cheating and when it is discovered. Lipstick on the shirt collar or private detectives no longer play a big role. The cell phone is on the bedside table, the man is in the shower, then it pings and the woman can read the message from her lover on the display.
The tracks are becoming more digital.
Today, clients bring with them a wealth of chat histories. This is usually of no legal significance. If the couple lives apart for a year, then the marriage has failed under our law. Point.
The guilt principle no longer exists, but those involved are still looking for someone to blame?
Always! I rarely have balanced clients who say: It was the fault of both of us, it just couldn’t work anymore.
Do you have more clients?
I represent both genders, but the bottom line is that more men come to me. I am often recommended for financial matters. And men often have the money.
Who is more emotional: men or women?
Both the same. Women often have more time and want to talk more with their lawyer. But men also sometimes burst into tears. For some people, their partner’s desire to separate is a huge surprise and a severe shock. Many also seek therapeutic help.
But you don’t see yourself as a therapist?
No way. Although I have a lot of life experience, over the years I’ve come to stay out of the emotions and work through what’s going on in a factual and legal way.
Is saying yes in front of the registrar still one of the most expensive decisions of our lives?
It can be her. Unless you try to regulate things differently through a prenuptial agreement. The law still applies to housewife marriage. There is a lifelong maintenance claim.
Wait a minute, maintenance law was changed a few years ago so that wives in particular could expect less, shorter or no maintenance at all.
Source: Stern
