A clarifying conversation in a partnership can quickly lead to a tangible relationship dispute. But you should be careful what you throw at your partner in your anger, some sentences are almost impossible to make up for.
Negative phrases that have offended or offended you are remembered longer than when someone says something positive to us. Especially when our own partner has hurt us. Many people underestimate the power of words, especially in a relationship dispute. An imaginary lever is quickly thrown, which activates the fight mode and you suddenly hear yourself saying things that you would rather have kept to yourself or actually didn’t mean at all.
You are not even aware of some of these sentences, but they hurt immensely and can cause massive damage to the relationship. That’s why it’s important to avoid them in a relationship.
These sentences and formulations are poison for a relationship dispute:
- “You’ve never / you’ve always done…” – Formulations that contain absolute statements such as “always” and “never” leave no room for good deeds
- “If you loved me, you would…” – This phrase involves emotional blackmail
- “You are just like your mother/father…” – A trigger point for many people, rather leave it alone
- “You used to…” – times and people change, this is more of a counterproductive accusation than a solution-oriented approach
- “Can’t you even…” – With this statement you deny the other person any competence
- “For the others you do xy and nothing happens here” – This sentence screams neediness and, in contrast to a request, is an attack
- “Others stand behind their partner” – This comparison is also part of emotional blackmail
- “Our friends/family are already saying that…” – Here you get verbal support from outside, so that the partner also looks bad and is pushed into the moral corner
- “We don’t speak the same language” – A statement that leads to nothing because it cannot be changed and, above all, it is not understandable
- “You never listen to me” – This sentence says that you can say what you want and it doesn’t matter, although you can’t judge that
In a relationship dispute, it’s always good to keep the ball low and prefer to remain silent and sleep on it for a night than to attack each other and the whole conflict in the partnership turn into a kind of battle. Insults, insinuations and emotional blackmail within such a conversation automatically only lead to even greater problems and injuries to the other person. If you are no longer able to remain calm and matter-of-fact, it is better to leave the room or the house before saying sentences that you regret and can never take back.
Source: Stern
I am a 24-year-old writer and journalist who has been working in the news industry for the past two years. I write primarily about market news, so if you’re looking for insights into what’s going on in the stock market or economic indicators, you’ve come to the right place. I also dabble in writing articles on lifestyle trends and pop culture news.
