The Better Valentine’s Day: Galentine’s Day celebrates friendship

Opinion

It’s boring as hell to hate Valentine’s Day. That’s why it would never occur to me to spread my malice about this kitsch romantic day here. And of course I’m a little happy about flowers too.

I would rather get the flowers today. Today is the much better Valentine’s Day: Galentine’s Day.

Like Valentine’s Day, Galentine’s Day comes – of course – from the USA and is – of course – just another day to be consumed. Unlike romantic love, today we celebrate friendly love. In German, Gals would probably be best translated as girls, which I find a bit embarrassing, but so be it. It’s about celebrating friendship – and that’s not embarrassing at all.

For weeks I’ve been seeing ideas for Galentine’s dates on Tiktok and Instagram: Some friends cook heart-shaped ravioli together, others make friendship bracelets or paint candles with flowers and hearts. They drink wine with it – or because it’s 2024 – a mocktail that is very nice and sparkly pink, but without alcohol. Everything is somehow a bit slippery, too sweet, too pink.

Galentine’s Day instead of Valentine’s Day: Please make your own pasta!

That’s why I wasn’t really convinced by the idea at first. I don’t have a date with my friends tonight, no, even worse: I have a date with my boyfriend. (All clear: I’m working tomorrow night. Take that, cheesy Valentine’s Day!)

But the more I think about it, the more I regret it. I don’t necessarily see myself making heart-shaped ravioli now, but I would like to make my own pasta again. I meet my friends regularly to do crafts: sometimes we make pottery, sometimes we make collages or linocut prints. Every year we make our Christmas cards together. Admittedly, sometimes we drink canned beer with it, but often enough we also drink wine or – almost as pink as the mocktails on Tiktok – Aperol Spritz.

That might be too girly for you, a little too boring. But there are few days when I laugh as much as the days when I do something with my friends. There are few people who can cheer me up on bad days like my friends. And when I’ve had a super busy week, all I want to do is lie on the sofa with my friend, drink tea with her and watch her clean up or go about her life.

Then came work, then came partners

For many years there were just us friends. We saw each other every day at university and usually spent more time drinking coffee than in the library. Then came work, partners came every now and then. Some left, mine stayed until now. And no matter how hard I tried to resist it, of course I had to reallocate my time, of course I have less time for my friendships.

For a long time I felt so secure in this friendship that it took me a while to understand that we can’t just stay friends – without effort, without appointments, without regular conversations. But friendships need to be nurtured, no matter how simple, easy and carefree they feel.

At its best, Galentine’s Day is a reminder: nurture your friendships! At least that’s what I want to do – probably not today, maybe not tomorrow, but at some point I’ll bring a bouquet of flowers to my friends. As a thank you for always making my life so much sweeter, so much slippery and sometimes so much wilder.

By the way: Men can also make ravioli themselves – and men need friends too.