There is abandoned sex questions and myths and we answer in this series together with sexologist Dania Schiftan. This episode is about increasing libido.
It is not just a phenomenon that occurs in couples married for years, even with young singles it can happen that the desire for sex is missing. This is completely independent of sexual orientation, age or gender. If you want to do something about it and want to get momentum back into love life, you can become active, says sexologist Dania Schiftan. In our series on the subject of sex questions and sex myths, the expert answers the star This time the question of how men and women can increase their libido.
How can I increase my libido?
To explain: The term libido comes from psychoanalysis and briefly describes the sex drive, i.e. the desire for sex. With a strong libido, it is more pronounced than with a weak. Not only from an elevated age or in a long -term relationship can it happen that the desire for sex drops. Younger people can also feel listlessness – sometimes unintentionally. Sexologist Dania Schiftan has devoted herself to the topic of lust in a complete book. In September 2024, “the comeback of your lust” will appear, in which – above all – women show how they simply (again) get more desire for sex. But one thing is important to mention: only if you want that. “Because nobody has to feel like it. And nobody should feel like it. It is completely okay without living sex as long as it is good,” she explains to that star.
Dania Schiftan also finds a certain approach worth mentioning: “If the other person lacks something in the relationship, it is basically not her problem at first. It would be a shame if she would like to want to have sex with you and is happy again for the reason.” The expert wants to give input so that you can be happy in her love life. “Regardless of whether you have sex with yourself or with others. Because sex that is fun who is exciting, that makes everyday stress fizzled out is a huge resource – for you. And sex that you enjoy makes you want to benefit more. That your partnerships can benefit from it.” The key to this fun and new lust is in them, in their own body, says the therapist.
She explains how to use this key. “Lust is a anticipation for what is coming. The more interesting the sexual experiences are, feel good, the sensuality, the sooner I make good memories and the sooner I want that again.” However, this is often a strong contrast to what you live in solosexuality. “Many people want to get to the climax briefly and quickly – that’s it.” With a layout vibrator or other aids, it is stimulated in a targeted manner and mostly intensively. If you then take it over in pair sexuality and thus spool, i.e. very goal -oriented, you will develop less and less anticipation on it. One of the main goals can therefore be found out how you can experience more in sexuality.
Woman
“Women should know that they should and may say no at any time, but they should also learn how to use sex as a resource for themselves.” To do this, you should free yourself from things that you hear from the outside to find out what you like yourself. This can be an erotic massage to which you register to find out how the sensual body contact is and whether it can be exciting. If the desire is missing, women should be ready for new things to test what touch she likes, what kind of sex she could like.
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When choosing sex toys, it should also not be ensured that women quickly get to the climax. Rather, it is about getting to know your own body even better and feeling what excited me for myself, what I would particularly like with a partner: sensual oral sex, exciting BDSM games or something else? To find out that, it can help to use sex toys to get to know your own preferences and use the imagination to find out whether these practices could increase libido. Like a tongue vibrator, for example, it can help because it does not lead to orgasm too quickly, but stimulates differently. Shibari is also a popular way to feel the body (again) and become particularly intimate with partners: to become particularly intimate inside. But that should best happen in a course under guidance. It is important that the sex toys do not replace body touch. They should only be used in moderation.
Man
In her new book, Dania Schiftan focused more on how Ms. can increase her libido. But the principle is a similar thing in men: to increase the libido, try it out very freely, which he likes. In doing so, men can also come from certain ideas, for example that he should take over the dominant part in a heterosexual cooperation, or, or, or, or. “Pressure pressure and the concentration on the fact that the penis always has to stand like one and at least an hour – which is completely utopian – what is completely utopian – are poison for enjoyable sexuality,” explains the sexologist.
Instead, you should find out how he can increase the anticipation for sex: taking a relaxed time-perhaps once role-playing games, a position that you have never made and that makes you laugh, or sometimes oral sex, for example using the use of .
The possibilities are almost countless and everyone should test different things to deal with your own body and your own desire. This is the only way to communicate in a relationship what you like and how you want to be touched. And that increases the quality in love life and at best, at best. Above all, however, your own well -being increases.
In the end, what the expert tries to illustrate in her new book applies: nothing has to, everything can. Everything that is good for yourself, which does not happen against the will of one or another, which is not only done for someone else and what can increase their very own libido. So that sex is (again) fun, life is enriched and more joy arises.
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Source: Stern
I’m Caroline, a journalist and author for 24 Hours Worlds. I specialize in health-related news and stories, bringing real-world impact to readers across the globe. With my experience in journalism and writing in both print and online formats, I strive to provide reliable information that resonates with audiences from all walks of life.
