Is your boss egocentric and authoritarian?: How to lead without losing your style

• Fixation for absolute control: They do not trust their team and assume that only their vision is valid.
• Acceptance of the style at high spheres: Many companies should have bosses like that, since they are functional to a vertical scheme. So they are very good obeying and executing orders, and reducing the possibility that there are things that get out of course.
• Speech monopolization: The egocentric leader listens to respond, not to understand.
• Contempt for feedback: The dissent, even constructive, is perceived as personal threats.
• Construction of a very personalist story: They attribute the successes exclusively to their leadership and outsource the failures. They rarely highlight a logo in which they are not the center.
• Disproportionate responses to dissent: Contrary opinions face disdain or reprisals. It is very frequent that your anger is increasing, and the bad ways manifest themselves in forms of verbal and psychological aggression.

Egocentric Chief

A recent McKinsey report warns that egocentric leaders, although effective in crisis contexts where centralized control seems crucial, erodes the morals of the team and discourage creativity in more dynamic environments.

Why of behavior

To find the roots in this way of acting, there is no single answer. Egocentrism is usually the result of deeply entrenched insecuritiesthat hide with a facade of authority. Besides, They usually have a double face: in the company they are handled in a way, and in personal life they are completely different. Next, possible answers.

• When “the one above” is egocentric: the impact on its teams: Working under an egocentric boss is an experience that tests the ethical and emotional fiber of any participatory leader and interested in the human profile of the company. The consequences are not trivial, and have a high cost at a human and corporate level:
• Emotional wear: The constant effort to be heard can lead to frustration and exhaustion.
• Influence reduction: Good ideas are usually ignored or worse, appropriate by the boss.
• They shut them up if they think differently. It is very frequent that in the meetings, the authoritarian, self -centered chief or despot aleces any attempt to contradict what he says. This leads to mute, obedient teams, without questioning decisions, and without making constructive contributions that could enrich the task. On the contrary, it encourages an obsequent attitude, in order not to generate discussions.
• Reactions that do not help. Many leaders instinctively react, either by confronting directly or isolation emotionally and reducing their contributions and professional delivery both responses, although understandable, are not sustainable or strategic in the long term, in addition to being demotivating.

10 strategies to prosper under an egocentric boss

1. Adopt a strategic perspective on the conflict: Focus on the long -term impact of your decisions.
2. The art of diplomacy dominates: Find ways to present your ideas as accessories, not as challenges, to the boss’s proposals.
3. Build internal alliances: Create a support network within the organization that supports your initiatives, increasing its visibility. Encourage to speak and express is part of this process.
4. Keep your emotional composure: Practice emotional regulation to avoid impulsive reactions to comments or provocative attitudes.
5. Frame the proposals in terms of benefits for the boss: Present your ideas highlighting how they reinforce their vision or reputation.
6. Listen to understand, not to react: Often, intentions behind egocentric behavior can be strategically used if they are well understood. A tool that can be useful is to replace your automatic “no” rejection, for “I understand your point, and…”, that is, you will remove the no, but, or any other expression that that egocentric boss can take it as an affront, and replace it with “y…”. The perception is completely different.
7. Order your ideas before answering: A frequent error of unreasonable managers is that they have difficulty putting limit to their automatic reactions. I suggest that, in addition to preparing the meetings in advance, you take notes and go ordering your arguments.
8. Identify behavior patterns: Learn to anticipate reactions and prepare your interactions accordingly.
9. Set subtle but firm limits: Without directly confronting, I know clear about the values ​​and standards that you are not willing to compromise.
10. Do not transfer your frustrations and differences to your team: It may be natural to feel disgusted in the face of the reactions of that boss who does not match anything with your leadership style.

bosses

Egocentrism is usually the result of deeply rooted insecurities, which are hidden with a facade of authority.

Change your behavior to change confrontations

As a final synthesis, here are three suggestions of bridges of behavior that you can exercise daily, and thus learn to live with this type of personalities:

1. Goes from anger to analysis: Use frustration as a signal to understand what triggers your emotions and how you can handle them, reinforce your internal self -management, apply to work and personally.
2. Move from rejection of strategic understanding: Even if you do not agree with your boss, for your style and ways, make the effort to understand your motivations to find connection points. Do not expect you to behave as you would like.
3. From confrontation to tactical collaboration: Instead of discussing, reformulate your opinions so that they stand out as complementary, non -competitive. The reptilian brain that we all have (the oldest in the evolution of the species, which regulates if we face or flee from situations), is reactively activated in the face of what is perceived as threat. Therefore, it seeks not to show ‘threats’ in your arguments and planning, but collaborations to improve even more.

By Daniel Colombo, facilitator and mastery executive coach specialized in senior management, professionals and teams; Mentor and professional communicator; international lecturer; Author of 33 books. LinkedIn Top Voice Latin America. Professional Coach certified by ICF at its maximum level, certified coach, member and mentor at Maxwell Leadership, John Maxwell’s team.