humor
Bastian Schweinsteiger was a great footballer. He wasn’t quite as great as a TV pundit at the European Championships. But we see certain possibilities of how he could still inspire us at the final.
For football fans, Bastian Schweinsteiger will always be the man who literally fought until he dropped in the 2014 World Cup final with a bleeding laceration under his right eye and who also secured the national team’s fourth world championship title with his dedication.
He did not really shine at the European Championships that are now coming to an end.
As a TV expert, he usually described things that even those with a moderate knowledge of football could easily recognize. But it was always amusing: sometimes Schweini confused a coffee mug with the microphone, sometimes he missed his cue and talked shop with a Dutch player during the semi-final – and ARD presenter Alexander Bommes had to see how he managed on his own.
This is how Bastian Schweinsteiger could become a TV hero
But Schweini still has the chance to go down in television history at the European Championship final between Spain and England. Here are five ideas on how he could achieve this:
- Bastian Schweinsteiger presents a coffee mug he invented himself that actually works as a microphone – even wirelessly. It doesn’t matter whether it’s black or with milk and sugar. Even with a cappuccino, the voice transmission is flawless.
- Bastian Schweinsteiger proposes to his beloved co-presenter Esther Sedlaczek in front of the camera. Whether she accepts or not remains to be seen, however, because Schweinsteiger’s wife Ana Ivanović suddenly appears from off-screen, swinging a tennis bag menacingly above her head. The camera pans briefly into the stadium sky, and sounds like a fight can be heard in the background. After a few seconds, the director displays a sign: “Short break,” accompanied by music by Hugo Strasser.
- Shortly before the start of the second half, Bastian Schweinsteiger ripped his clothes off while analyzing the game and was wearing a complete Spanish jersey underneath. He substituted himself in in the 46th minute (see Netzer/Weisweiler 1973) and immediately scored an own goal. A total of eight burly security guards were needed to remove the streaker from the field.
- Bastian Schweinsteiger gets a violent coughing fit during his first razor-sharp analysis (“The Spaniards run a lot, but the English run a lot too!”), which finally frees his vocal cords from all the baggage of the past. And suddenly his deep, voluminous bass sounds for the first time.
- Bastian Schweinsteiger suddenly delivers amazingly brilliant analyses, is funny, quick-witted, modest. The TV audience and co-presenters hang on his every word. Suddenly “Schweini” is grinning from ear to ear. Then he tugs at his face from the chin. A moment like in the “Mission Impossible” films. And lo and behold: the TV expert is wearing a clever mask, which he now pulls off his head. And standing before us, grinning: Christoph Kramer.
Source: Stern
I am Pierce Boyd, a driven and ambitious professional working in the news industry. I have been writing for 24 Hours Worlds for over five years, specializing in sports section coverage. During my tenure at the publication, I have built an impressive portfolio of articles that has earned me a reputation as an experienced journalist and content creator.
