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Single: 17 reasons why some people can’t find a partner

Single: 17 reasons why some people can’t find a partner
Single: 17 reasons why some people can’t find a partner

Isn’t life better with a partner? Most of the time, yes, so many singles are looking for a partner. But this search often becomes a challenge. A study shows why this is the case.

Not everyone who is single wants to change this status. But many are desperately looking for a partner, and then it just doesn’t work out. Why? Researchers from Greece have tackled this problem. Menelaos Apostolou and Elli Michaelidou identified 17 factors that can make the search for a partner more difficult or easier.

The relatively high incidence of involuntary singleness raises the question of its causes, say the researchers. For their study, the researchers interviewed 1,432 people, 734 women (average age 35) and 698 men (average age 39). The group of respondents included both people who were in relationships and those who were either voluntarily or involuntarily single.

The study asked about the effects of 17 different characteristics and personality traits – which are important for dating success and which are not. They are:

  1. compatibility
  2. Body mass index (BMI)
  3. Ability to perceive flirting attempts
  4. Be selective
  5. conscientiousness
  6. Talkativeness
  7. Flirtability
  8. Sexual openness
  9. Emotion control
  10. openness
  11. Self-esteem
  12. Self-perceived partner value
  13. Sexual functioning
  14. shyness
  15. Self-assessed attractiveness
  16. Sexual orientation
  17. Children from previous relationships

The study investigated the question of what connection there might be between these factors and involuntary singlehood. This is not the first study to attempt to clarify the mismatch problem – the paradox that societies with largely free choice of partner have a high proportion of involuntary singles. The approach of Menelaos Apostolou and Elli Michaelidou is innovative because they ask about a number of factors and examine their correlations. The results of the evaluations show that there are key factors that increase the likelihood of remaining single and not finding a partner despite wanting one. However, these characteristics are different for men and women.

Women and men remain single for different reasons

The result: No one factor alone condemns you to involuntary singledom. It only becomes difficult when certain characteristics come together. A poor ability to flirt is a negative factor for men and women. This is hardly surprising, because flirting is a key skill, without which there is a lack of initial contact. For women, it only becomes hopeless when poor flirting is accompanied by a cluster of poor ability to flirt, sexual secrecy, pickiness in finding a partner and poor compatibility. Then a long life of singledom is almost inevitable.

Poor flirting techniques are also a negative factor for men. But they form the minus cluster with other factors than for women. For them, these are: poor emotional control, low self-esteem. Added to this is an increased body mass index (BMI) and impaired sexual functioning.

One result is the same for both sexes: nothing works without good flirting techniques. But they are only a start; those affected should also keep an eye on the other negative factors and work on them if necessary if they want to find a partner.

Sources:,

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Source: Stern

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