Miriam Höller about the consequences of her accident
“I never became the one I was”
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Miriam Höller had to cope with a serious accident and the death of her partner within a few weeks. That’s how she feels her now.
Miriam Höller (37) pulled the ground under his feet in 2016: at a helicopter stunt in high heels, she broke both feet and had to end her career as a stunt woman at a helicopter stunt. A few weeks later, her partner Hannes Arch (1967-2016) died in a helicopter crash. The 37-year-old describes how she got back on her feet in her book “Life is unfair: and that’s a good thing” (Econ).
In an interview with Spot on News, the former “Germany’s Next Top Model” candidate, who is currently saying her new love for Koch and moderator Roland Trettl (53), about her deceased partner: “Hannes is now very far away and that is also good this way.” The lecture speaker and author also reveals the physical restrictions she still has after her accident.
In “Life is unfair: and that’s a good thing” you wrote down your story. What does the book mean for you?
Miriam Höller: The book has been created in the past eight years. I started writing from therapeutic purposes when I was in the hospital after I broke my feet. When reading these lines you can tell that this is the Miriam who wrote at the time. After all, the last section of a chapter is always the Miriam, who looks at the situation today and shares her teachings. This makes it a very good mix of real life story and the reflected Miriam, which now encourages people.
For me, it also means a conclusion from these deep blows, and above all also letting go of the past. Because I have never looked at the future with as much joy as now. It was really a lot of work to heal, I had a lot of fighting, I dealt intensively with myself and life, but now I’m really looking forward to what is coming.
How long did you have with your fate?
Höller: I always hoped to be able to say at some point that I have made peace with the past. This moment came at home very unspectacularly after seven years. Even in the past, I was able to be happy and lead a good life. Only this deep feeling, peace with life, with me and with what happened to me to have closed – it really took years. That is why the book comes out now. It took me time to understand, process it to finally reflect on it.
In the book you describe your low point after the death of your partner. They were close to completing life themselves. How do you think about this hardest phase today?
Höller: Even after many research and after everything I have read and learned, I know that suicidal thoughts are not so abnormal. At the same time, it is crazy for me to look at the Miriam from back then. I never thought that a person who is in life and is so full of joie de vivre can fall so deep in the shortest possible time. I would not have thought that something so bad in life can happen that I doubt everything. Because I have experienced this, I deal with life and with myself very differently today. I am much more gentle to myself because I know how fragile I am as a person and how insecure life is.
After all, they have found meaning in their suffering, they also encourage other people as a speaker. Who gave them a stop at the time?
Höller: I had and have a great environment, be it my family, friends, but also acquaintances who experienced something similar. At the same time, I also know today: You can still have such a good environment and so much support – if you don’t want to fight, everyone else around you will also get tired. It helped me to ask me the question again and again: do you want to be in the victim role or take on responsibility? And I ask myself that until today. It is really up to yourself which attitude you go through life.
How did experts and self -help group help you?
Höller: I was able to orientate myself and put my pain in relation to the people who have experienced something similar. With professional help, I also found answers, including in conversations in which I was asked good questions. I can recommend that to everyone.
Was there a point where they were close to the bitterness?
Höller: Definitely. The point was there very often. It was not the case that I constantly went through a process in which it gets a little better every day. This is a constant up and down. At a moment you think you have understood it, and the next day it is terrible again. In the end you will be rewarded for the constant and get up for this again and again, for courageous decisions and for going out.
How does the Miriam differ from that of today’s fate strikes from that of today?
Höller: The Miriam from the past was the stunt woman, who felt unstoppable and sometimes immortal. Which went through life very naive and light -footed, optimistic. The deep strokes, above all, did a thing with me: On the day the news came that Hannes died, I got grown up from now on. It was the feeling that it is over with fun, now the seriousness of life begins. I still notice that these deep blows have brought seriousness into my life because they came in a row. But I do not perceive that as negative, but as a exchange. Today I see myself as a very strong, mature, sovereign wife, who deals much more appreciated with themselves, with the people around them and over time. I have become more relaxed, loving and clearer. I am much more conscious about how quickly everything can be over and that’s why I enjoy life and live life differently than before.
What about the physical healing process after the foot breaks?
Höller: I have never become the one I used to be. That will never be again. Today I can go again that the serious injuries are not seen. But jogging, for example, no longer works. I also struggled with that for a long time. But is it about stepping into old footsteps or about developing and reinventing yourself at the time? I wonder: what is in my past value for my future? Refinating yourself is a lot of work, but also a process of life. I don’t want to be a stunt woman today. I no longer have to jump out of airplanes. My pain also has resulted in valuable things, so that today I bring people to find the beauty in their own history in their own history.
Do you have rituals with which you commemorate your late partner?
Höller: Hannes is now very far away for me and that’s a good thing. I now feel like a future. For years I hoped that he might come back. But it is very important to understand that we have to let go so that we can move on. Here and then I think that this could have been Hannes, who throws a new chance in front of my feet again or maybe leads me through life a bit. These are nice thoughts that make life easier for me. However, I no longer want to focus on my past. It was a wonderful time that I look at with gratitude and appreciation. And now it’s just going forward.
Help with depression and thoughts of suicide offers telephone counseling at the free number: 0800/111 0 111
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Source: Stern

I am an author and journalist who has worked in the entertainment industry for over a decade. I currently work as a news editor at a major news website, and my focus is on covering the latest trends in entertainment. I also write occasional pieces for other outlets, and have authored two books about the entertainment industry.